Mental health and suicide are synonymous. They literally go hand in hand in many cases. Especially with illnesses involving depression, anxiety and mania. But suicide is never the answer to any dilemma. It is the permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Bipolar disorder is one of the number one causes of suicidal ideations. When a person suffering the manic side of the illness begins to “come down” and lose the manic energy, they can become suicidal. This is because the depressive side of bipolar disorder is seen as the “black hole” that sucks you in. It is the nothingness where everything falls apart.
The permanent solution to a temporary problem.
There is no coming back after suicide. Obviously, this is the reason people attempt or carry it out. Feelings of hopelessness, grief and sorrow can be overwhelming. Feeling like there is no hope or way out, suicide seems like the answer. If you are no longer alive, the pain will go away. I used to believe that suicide was an act of selfishness. But now I realize it is not a selfish act at all.
When a person feels suicidal, they feel like they are a burden on loved ones. They are convinced that everyone else would be better off without them. The belief of being a drain and worthless, suicide can seem like a logical choice. When I was feeling suicidal, I was distraught with grief and sorrow. I felt that I was a burden, and I wanted the pain to go away.
My ex and I had split up two years prior, and I found out through a paternity test that I was not the father. I never saw her again after that day. Three years later I hit rock bottom. I placed a shotgun to my forehead, and was ready to pull the trigger. But instead, I decided I would just survive until things got better. What if my parents found me? What if they had my niece and nephews with them when they did? I could not take that chance, so I decided to stay.
Suicide is never the answer.
There is no coming back from suicide. And you will never know if things could or would have gotten better. If you could have been happy, or had the life you always wanted. Even if you do survive an attempt, the consequences can be grave. Last year a young woman shot herself and survived. She lost her face and had to have a face transplant as a result. People have tried to overdose and survived, only to have brain damage. The risk of surviving and becoming seriously disabled is not worth it. Suicide is never the answer and should never be attempted. Even if you are in physical pain, it is never the answer.
I have suffered from pain most of my life. At the age of 42, my pain has been present since age 18. A car accident with an 18-wheeler semi left me with a chronic back injury. Eventually I had back surgery when I was 24, but after a few years it failed. I know what chronic pain feels like. Because of my pain I nearly became addicted to opiates. But thankfully, I did not and I was able to stop using them.
If you have thoughts of suicide, get help!
If you or someone you love is having suicidal thoughts, please contact the national suicide hotline. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Nothing is worth taking your own life. I know, I almost did.
Hack the Stigma. Hack the Planet.
IamThePatRatt – The Bipolar Hacker